Let's face facts, I screw up a lot. You all may be thinking, "oh you're just human, everyone makes mistakes." but at what point are those mistakes so common that you inevitably destroy what was once right and replace it with this twisted version of reality. People place their lives in the hands of those around them whether they want to believe it or not, their views, beliefs, habits, and just overall who they are to become is at stake and sitting in the hands of their peers. There's where the problem is, we look to others to see what is acceptable and morally wrong and right. Now, I'm not stupid and I realize this is easier said than done, trust me I've tried, but what I am saying is that you can sit back and realize this and find who YOU are not what your surroundings tell you, you are. I have spent countless hours of my life on a journey, a journey to find myself and who i really am. It seemed to have worked but as of today I realized that I have reverted back to my old ways of commanding and leading through fear and force. This truly is who, as a human man by nature, I should be but not who I am as a person, as a soul, mentally I have two functions. By nature I am to fight and lead, let's face it I have violent tendencies and I use this to pressure people into Doing what I want them to. Historically this probably would have been handy for leading hunting and organizing in order to stay alive ( I dont know if this is true but it would be my best guess) Modern day has no need for this. And therefore I am aggressively using what I don't need. I am not saying that I always am this way but I can be. Life is a complex and odd thing and it's a challenge to figure out who you're supposed to be vs. What your natural instincts tell you to be. Here's what i propose we do about this, try it out and email me about your results if you want. This has worked in the past and i need to do this on a regular basis. Take time for yourself, grab your iPod, or whatever MP3 player you have and just go to your favorite spot or somewhere new, just make sure you're able to focus on yourself and not what's around you. I chose the woods or a field because I have a need for nature. Sit down and make yourself comfortable, listen to your favorite soothing music and just think about your dreams and what you have done wrong. This seems easy but from what I have found people like to forget or hide these memories, even to themselves but just think about them, think about how that effected you life and why you wouldn't want that to happen again. While your mind desperately wants to forget it is important to remember because if you can't remember your mistakes you are bound to repeat them. For me this has helped me sort through a lot of things that needed to be remembered, it calmed me and made me focus on who I was becoming and not who I was. I urge you to try this for yourself. Stay calm and remember to be who you want to be not who you are supposed to be by nature and society. -Cale Fichter
If any questions, email me @ cf1991@live.missouristate.edu
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